Who links to me? the journal of a semi-insane man: March 2007

Monday, March 26, 2007

Filipino translation of "Desafinado"!

From Butch Dalisay's Penman Column comes this superb translation of Antonio Carlos Jobim's Desafinado by Pete Lacaba.

I've heard english translations of the song but never quite heard the words since the music seems to put me, in a trance.

Disintunado
Music: Antonio Carlos Jobim
Original Portuguese lyrics: Newton Mendonça, 1962
English lyrics: Jon Hendricks and Jessie Cavanaugh

Pagsinta ay awit na walang-hanggan,
Tila ba harana sa kalangitan,
Isang haranang gigising sa puso’t diwa mo,
Pero tayo’y medyo wala sa tono.

Dati ang halik mo ay bumibirit,
Ngayon ay tila tinig na naiipit.
Ibang tugtog na ba ang nasa labi mo,
Nilimot ang kundiman ko sa ‘yo?

Noon ang tiyempo natin ay akmang-akma,
Ngayon ang mga letra ay hindi nagtutugma.
Hindi na maalala’ng himig na kinakanta,
Wala sa tono tayong dalawa.

Pagtugmain muli ang ating damdamin,
Indayog ng duweto ay muli nating buhayin.
Babalik na tayo sa wastong tono,
At di na disintunado
Ang kundimang ating inaawit,
Magiging awit ng anghel
Ang ating pag-ibig!


Superb!

Monday, March 19, 2007

On Rachanee

My new crush. :) She has a great voice and I believe she'll be big in the future. (www.rachanee.net)

A critique of Michael Andrada's Ascaris lumbricoides

Michael Andrada's "ASCARIS LUMBRICOIDES": a case of mistaken worm?
Rodelen C. Paccial

First, here is a link to Michael Andrada's poem
http://www.panitikan.com.ph/poetry/ascarislumbricoides.htm

I first talked about this poem to my dagyangpulong colleagues down at a manokan/watering hole near our spiritual home of University of San Agustin and our meeting place Coffeebreak at Gen. Luna St., Iloilo City

To my pleasant surprise, the two younger poets in the group were very much appreciative of Mr. Andrada's poetry (Pure San Diego and Laurence Bernabe), and one actually was a co-fellow at the 2nd Iyas (Rey Salem). It actually means that the younger ones are reading contemporary Filipino poets (and this would bode well for the country's literary future). So as you can see, my next comments on Mr. Andrada's poetry were very much discussed.

As in the 4th Iyas, of which I was a part, there was a lot of discussion on poetry and science, as we had a lot of writers with science backgrounds (Andrea had a postgrad on Chem, Arkaye is studying Chem, Bebang was working for IRRI, Rex is a Mathematics/Lit teacher, and myself, am a medical graduate). The discussion was very interesting when it came to poems with scientific frameworks. There were poems which relied heavily on the science to bring about its poetic effect and maybe in the future I could quote some works from that workshop. This, for me, was problematic when the poet didn't get the science right!

My view on poems tackling issues with science in it, is that it should get the science right. The poems which would rely on the science to bring out its poetic effect should get the facts right. I remember Dr. Evasco talk about a poem as a "world" on its own. The reader gets into the world and gets himself lost in it, experiences it, and hopefully is affected by it and takes meaningful thoughts with him. Hopefully, this makes him a better person, for the experience of a poem is a real experience and as meaningful as the lessons that we learn from travels maybe, or from the idle time inside the bus while travelling.

A poem with scientific discrepancies, if not designed by the author (for example, a poet may talk of flying cows and talking fish), would come out as a defective poem. If the poem was a "world", an author then is selling a False world, and the readers who gets into it gets a false experience. If the author is ignorant of his mistakes, then he is selling ignorance, and the reader who is ignorant then, will take the falsehood as truth. Therefore, it is a situation of ignorance begetting ignorance.

Let me put a qualifier however, lest this comes out as a mere negative critique of an excellent poets work. I have read some of Michael Andrada's poems (mostly those published in the internet, in Panitikan. com and Makata) and I've found his poetry to be good. His knowledge and experience of what good literature is, his tastes, his skills, are definitely better than mine, and if ever I develop to be as good a writer as he is, it would be as if I have reached my own dreams. I will however use a poem of his to illustrate my point, that the poet must be sensitive to the facts that he sells. We must be merchants and pedants of truth when it comes to this.

The second to the fourth stanzas of the poem presents one such problem:

Pansinin mo ang magkabilang dulo
Ng aking patpating katawan.
Alin sa tingin mo ang aking ulo?
Alin ang puwitan?

Alinman sa dalawa
Ang ituro mo,
Pasensiya na Ginoo,
Ngunit nagkakamali ka.

Nasa tagiliran ko
Ang labasan
Ng sama ng loob,
Ng dumi ng katawan.

These stanzas involve the persona (the "ascaris") asking the man pouring the salt, where his head or his ass is. When read in isolation, the second stanza has no problem, as it is probable that a layman who pours salt on "ascaris" would not know any better (as a layman who watches ascaris, which would've come from human feces i'd presume, he really doesn't know any better; it is possible to point the head and the anus of the ascaris grossly). but when taken with the third and fourth stanza, it becomes problematic. The real "ascaris" seems confused with his own anatomy, in two ways:

1) It is true that the Ascaris has an excretory pore on his so called "side" but this is most of the time, except in a few natural variations, located near the head (ulo). Therefore for an imaginary thinking ascaris to think that his excretory pore isn't near the head when the man points at it is absurd. (We will use head here instead of "anterior end" because a poet can call any part of the anatomy any name, that is his creative discretion. Anterior end if translated to Filipino should read as "ulohan")

2)Since the adult nematode is cylindrical, the ascaris cannot possibly point to any side "tagiliran" of his body.

These three stanzas also follow a non-sequitor flow of thoughts. After the ascaris asked the salt pouring gentleman where his head or ass is, and presumably after the gentleman has pointed to either end of the ascaris, the ascaris then said "nagkakamali ka", The gentleman at this point would have asked why? The ascaris answered "Nasa tagiliran ko/Ang labasan/Ng sama ng loob,/Ng dumi ng katawan." This reply is non-sequitor to the first question which was where do you think my head or ass is? Take note, the question of where the ascaris head or ass is wasn't a question of where his excretory pore was. This ascaris then is an illogical ascaris, and we should be careful of him.

The first and second stanzas of the second part I think presents the central problem in science, or facts, of this poem:
Ngunit ano ba'ng marumi?
Lupa ang aking agahan,
Tanghalian, minindal, hapunan.
Ito rin ang aking tahanan.

At kapag umulan, ang mga butas
Na ginagawa ko sa ilalim
Ng lupa - ang aking lagusang-
Tahanan - ang siyang dinadaluyan.

You see, the life cycle of the ascaris is such that it only becomes a worm almost exclusively inside the human body, although in pig and dogs, they might also. An ascaris worm will not survive the environment outside the human body for long, for several reasons: one, as a parasite, it has evolved to live mostly in the optimal conditions of the human intestine; two, as a parasite, it will have no food source outside the host; three, it has no adaptations for living as a full grown worm outside the human body, meaning it can't burrow under the ground, it can't make tunnels, etc...

The ascaris doesn't eat dirt for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. It can only gain nourishment from the blood supply of the intestinal mucosa. The earth isn't its home (as an adult, as eggs the earth serves as its home) The Tahanang-lagusan then cannot be the ascaris worms doing.

In fact, I have a great suspicion that the poet was talking about the earthworm when he wrote the poem, which could be any of a great number of species around the world... There are many more instances in the poem which would indicate that indeed this is an earthworm and not ascaris. See them for yourself...

So the poem suffered a loss of "believability" and some "error of facts" because of this. There are some facts in science that one can overlook, when this is not the central symbol/metaphor of the poem, one may as well read beyond it and give the poem a chance to "speak its utterance". But in this case, in my humble opinion, the wrong worm drove the poem into dangerous "semento na pumipigil sa (kanyang) paghinga."




ano ang kinain ni Bobby Vilassis sa umaga na papunta siya ng Bacolod para maging panelist sa Iyas?
Rodelen Paccial

Pansit.

Kumain siya ng pansit;
mahaba, nakakabwisit.

nasa kanyang isip,
maiiwan niyang mag-isa
ang bote ng san mig,
sa dumagueteng
lupang hinirang
ng mga magigilyong
bayani sa wikang Ingles.

kanyang sinipsip ang pansit,
na bwisit na bwisit
dahil ito'y di maputol
ng kanyang huna-huna.

tapos sopdrinks.
iyon, kanyang ininom,
at ang itim na likidong
nakakasunog kung laplapin
ng mabilisan
ay nagkasundo
sa modo
ni Bobby Vilassis
ng papunta siya ng Bacolod.

Siguro, maayo din doon.
sa isip niya
at inisip niya
ang mahabang sakay
ang amoy ng asukal
sa loob ng mga puno ng tubo
na tumubo
sa lupang hinirang
bayang magilyong
land of the morning,
child of the sun returning,
dumaguete.

at nabwisit ulit siya.
bwisit na bwisit,
na parang pansit
na niluto pa nung isang araw
at di maputol-maputol
sa kanyang isip
ang mga huna-huna
ng gabing naiwan siyang mag-isa
sa bahay nila
nung bata pa siya
at wala ang kanyang mga magulang.

at siya'y gutom na gutom.
at ang naiwang ulam lamang
ay ang dilaw na pansit
na nung isang araw pa niluto
ng ama niyang mandirigma
sa ikalawang digmaang pandaigdig,
bilang guerilla,
isang english-spokening type,
who fought the damn Japs,
through the forests of actual trees
and mountains of metaphor,
in my dear beloved,
land of the lovely beach,
dumaguete.

at di niya maputol-putol
ang pansit,
naalala niya ulit
kaninang umaga
at pagbaba niya sa bacolod,
bumili siya ng sopdrinks,
green at malamig.

at iyon ay di sumang-ayon sa modo
ni Bobby Vilassis at lumabas
siya ng carinderiang
naghahanap
ng yosi, at kanyang nakilala
si Maria
na taga-La Salle.

at ito'y sumag-ayon sa kanyang modo.
at naging mahinahon ang panahon
at mga pangyayari,
pumasok siya ng La Salle,
nakangiting may baong pakete ng yosi
at lipstick ni Maria
sa kanyang leeg
sa ilalim ng kuwelyo
ng orange at dilaw
niyang polo;
parehong hindi nakita ng guard,
na okyupado sa pagkain
ng pansit
sa huling gabi niya sa bacolod
bago siya umuwi ng dumaguete,
kung saan dumuduyan
ang mga magigiting
na heroes.

the poem tells of a fictional Bobby Vilassis and a reference to the Dumaguete Workshop's preference for English works only. I personally think that they have their reasons. Anyways, the paralellism of English/Dumaguete/Nation in the poem was a reflection of what the writers in Filipino thought of the workshop. But beyond this it is a tribute to Bobby Vilassis who in my opinion was one of the better panelists to Iyas.
gay day
Rodelen Paccial

If you were gay,
and we met on the street,
near the park,
where there are green trees,
and the breeze is cool,
and you said "Hi", and asked me how i was,
i'd tell you "I'm fine, and thank you",
and if i have some money,
i'd ask you to join me at the outdoor cafe
and have coffee,
where maybe,
on the street,
near the park,
where the green leaves can be seen,
sweeping the sky of its memories of rain,
you'll tell me about your summers,
and me, you, my research on sleeping disorders,
we'd part maybe,
after fifteen minutes,
after a handshake,
and a thought
of how pleasant this day has been.


this poem was a part of the intense discusion me and my friends had over the issues raised in the Isagani Cruz/ Manolo Quezon columns. It was a heated one to say the least and this poem didn't do its job with its message of tolerance towards those in the group who were for homosexuality. Oh well, the poem isn't half-bad i think.